I think I have come to the conclusion that I am grieving for the loss of my mother, before her earthly body has even left us.  This happened with my dad too.  They change so drastically, it seems they are gone....at least the parent you knew for so many years.  I still remember the day we moved from Indiana.  Since then, goodbyes have been the thing I hate most in this world.  Just the act of saying goodbye and once I have moved away from that moment, I do o.k.  Watching a parent age is like the longest goodbye in the world.  I love my mother so very much.  She talks about dad more all the time.  I think it could be very soon.  How do I feel about that?  I don't know.

Today is Mikey's birthday.  31!  Amazing journey getting here.  Hasn't always been easy.  I am grateful everyday that God spared his life.  It wouldn't be the same around here without him.  I have the most wonderful children in the world.  Just got back from Indiana with my daughter.  I love spending time with my children.  That connection is such a gift from God.  No wonder it is such a struggle to let go when the time comes.